Months ago, if you’d have asked, I would have probably said I was happy. Unconventional, yes, but happy nonetheless. Fast forward to today (4/12/17), all of that carefully curated happiness has rotted away. The dream is dead, and hope is a cold corpse. Now it’s just me, a cold room, 7am wake-ups, and a notification-less […]Read more "Untitled (or) Leaving myself"
i’m currently in boxers and a flannel shirt, the sleeves rolled up. My friends are asleep on the couch. the cauldron is empty. halloween was a mess. I’m typing these words on my phone: from binge watching the second season of Stranger things (fairly decent sophomore season) to bumping into girls in short black dresses […]Read more "life’s not cool"
I’m listening to King Krule’s The Ooz (Released today). It’s a masterpiece. Now I’m back to familiar territory romanticising past experiences, thinking about the lost love. The ones who’ve moved on and figured their lives out. This year I met and fell for a girl from Spain. It was a strange, inexplicable romance, that felt […]Read more "Eyes red and raw"
Been up to a lot this year; talked long with an ex(es), family tragedy and fell for someone. Now it’s July, and all that’s faded. Now I’m left listening to Conor Oberst’s Ruminations. Knowing if I’d of stayed responding to her messages I’d of burnt out. Now maybe loneliness is my worst nightmare. Maybe in […]Read more "Her and the subsequent confusion"
Currently I’m decaying in the lovely state of Florida on a relaxing break from the dreary remnants of shitty north western Britain. The Floridian sun fruitlessly trying to scorch my pale skin and my hair growing long and unkempt. I’m filling the days alone listening to Leonard Cohen, Nick Drake and Father John Misty on […]Read more "The carefree, godless, hopeless drifter muses once again "
No reprise needed here. Recently I’ve been having what I guess could be called an awakening of some sort; think George Harrison or Josh Tillman becoming Father John Misty. I’ve begun work on something big to say the least. It’s been brewing in me for a very long time. With five years in my rear […]Read more "I’m a guy with a hat and I know I like my hat"
I know a girl. That’s a mouthful. In fact to rephrase that; I know girls: I know one with an ever growing predilection for drugs, I know one with a horrible, soul crushingly bad taste in boys, I know one so narcissistic that the photos she takes of her bath products she thinks makes her […]Read more "Beautiful pristine untouched virgin girl / messy cracked broken sexually active sad girl"
In a sudden, and unexpected decision I have removed myself from social media. My Instagram being sent into oblivion. My Facebook being deleted from my phone. I did this for a multitude of reasons; my own wellbeing, inspired; by Frank Ocean’s lack of social media, removing distractions, my loathing of the workings of social media. […]Read more "A change of pace"
The download link: Between Relationships By Ben Brizell After many nightly hours of drinking too much coffee, listening to The Smiths whilst consumed by Microsoft word, I am pleased to announce that my debut and self-published chapbook Between Relationships is now available for download right here on this blog, right now! If you have downloaded […]Read more "My Chapbook- Between Relationships available now"
Where the title came from? The corridors of my mind, whilst I sat idly listening to Deftones enveloped in the moment. My computer screen blank. Now I sit in a macdonalds still listening to Deftones, thinking of the girl who long ago said she blocked out all her bad memories, to the point where she […]Read more "She cuts her ties, then her wrists"